Friday, January 31, 2014

Lastly, in case you hadn't heard:


January was bitch-ass cold.

January 28.

Here's hoping February proves more merciful.


Sing...sing a song...


I was flipping through a photo album on Facebook one night on a page full of awesome old Ashland photos when I bumped into this:


May 1985.


That's my brother Dewey in the Ernie costume.  Small world!  This was taken at Beaser School in May 1985 on the day of the spring music program...they're standing in the school library, and if you drive down Beaser Avenue today, you'll see the houses in the background are all still there.

Here's a few more from my mother's files...those Sesame Street costumes are pretty sweet, especially for homemade stuff.

Dewey in a school program at Beaser, May 1985.


Bert & Ernie.

What's making me happy this week.



Two Onion/AV Club stories that are eerily reminiscent of my life:

Area Woman Said ‘Sorry’ 118 Times Yesterday
(my coworker refers to my compulsive "sorry"-ing as "sorry/not sorry")

Jennifer Lawrence spirals into nightmarish addiction to Doritos


Thursday, January 30, 2014

Why Toivo cannot be left unattended in the kitchen.


January 18.


Little stinker.


14 in 2014: #1.


January 19.

Alright, getting an early start!

I found a new earflap hat pattern (one sized for bulkier yarn than I usually use), and I really like it -- the end result winds up being a little looser and a little stretchier than my go-to pattern I've been using for the last few years.  I whipped up the top two for my friends Paula & Nick's new twin girls, Sonja and Veronica, and made the blue one below for their big brother Charlie.
Hat for Charlie.

Also:  not new patterns for me, but I made two blankets, too.  AND a two-peas-in-a-pod set with cocoon & hats.  Boom!  Productive!

January 11.January 16.
January 26.

Thursday, January 23, 2014

My mother, explaining the Kardashians to my father.


"I've never seen that show, I think they just stand around and try on clothes or something useless like that.  That's the one that got married for, like, a month or something, to that basketball player that looked like a neanderthal.  It was pretty tacky.  Now she goes out with that rude rapper guy that got mad at George Bush.  Her father was one of O.J. Simpson's lawyers, and he was obviously kind of slimy.  They got divorced, and then her mother married that Olympic guy, what's-his-name...Bruce?  He basically looks like a lady now.  They're all a bunch of idiots.  They keep letting people like that get married over and over, but they won't let the gays.  What a world."


Wednesday, January 22, 2014

14 in 2014.


I didn't make any New Year's resolutions on New Year's Eve this year.  But I did make some last year...how'd I do? 
  • Read 13 books in 2013. Oh, I failed.  I failed miserably.  Don't get me wrong -- I read a ton.  I read magazines, I read online, I read stuff at work...but books?  Actual books?  I think I read two or three, tops.

  • Keep diligently updating my 365 Pictures project.  I did this!  And liked it enough that I started another year of pictures on my birthday in April (and have kept it up every single day so far).

  • Get around to watching the 17-disc set of The Complete Larry Sanders Show.  Still sitting on my bookcase.  But, I did start winding my way through the first two seasons of It's Garry Shandling's Show, so it's kind of a half-victory, right?

  • Sort out my old pictures.  Nothing!  I did nothing!

  • Crochet 13 things I've never made before.  I did it, and even beat it by one.  Great success!
  • Procrastinate less.  And be more spontaneous, too.  This one's hard to measure, but I think I did alright.  Maybe this year I should resolve to get less distracted, though, since I keep bouncing from project to project... 

I think for 2014, I'll do the "14 in 2014" crocheting challenge again, ifonly to keep finding new ways to use up the insane amount of yarn in my stash.  Maybe that's one way to harness my tendency to get distracted -- knowing there's always another new thing coming around the corner might be a way to harness my attention span for good instead of evil.

Police blotter.



Monday, 9:05 A.M.:  Complaint about neighbor: their dogs poop between the houses and there is approximately 6 inches of dog poop between the houses.

Thursday:  A very angry caller requested a deputy ticket a vehicle that continues to park in a handicapped spot.  The caller was so angry that she leaned the sign against the man's car.  Caller was advised that the man was moving the next day.

Friday:  A 911 call was received from a caller about her mother yelling at her and "holding her cell phone hostage."  She called again and demanded that someone respond and make her mother give back her phone.



Tuesday, January 07, 2014

#Hashtag.


If you're on Twitter, do yourself a favor and follow Nancy Grace (of HLN/Headline News). Do it for the hashtags...oh, the glorious hashtags.



#‎StripClubBaby‬
#‎KissOfDeath‬ 
#‎BabyForSale‬
#‎ChainedToChicken‬
#‎DoggyDoorDoctor‬
#‎DoggyDoorThief‬
#‎DeadlyDaycare‬
#‎DeadlyJoyride‬
#‎FatalFall‬
#‎TillMoneyDoUsPart‬
#‎HugsInSchool‬
#‎StairwayToDeath‬
#‎ButtDialMurder‬
#‎DrunkDriveElf‬
#‎ChristianRockMurderPlot‬
#‎DoseOfPoison‬
#‎BeerTot‬
#‎PotTot‬
#‎VacuumSex‬
#‎SexAndEggs‬
#‎HotCrayons‬
#‎BoxOfInfants‬
#‎Outrage‬


Sunday, January 05, 2014

What's making me happy this week.


I'm not happy that we're nosing up on a cold snap that'll keep us in the subzero bubble for the foreseeable future (or 'til the middle of the week, at least).  But I am happy that I live in an area of the country that is mentally/physically/polar-fleeced-ly equipped to deal with it, unlike the bevy of southerners and east coast people in my Facebook feed who are losing their collective sh*t at the prospect of being truly, genuinely COLD for a few days. WINTER IS COMING.

So basically, what's making me happy this week is my cold weather superiority complex.



Oh -- and the chance to get this stuck in my head again, like I do every year when the cold snaps come.  Surely, my inner Viking is kitten-shaped.