This was pretty great.
Thursday, February 28, 2013
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
It was a slow start, but I'm on my way!
Employee of the Month and Other Big Deals by Mary Jo Pehl
I'm too lazy to write a proper book report, but here are some thoughts:
- Favorite stories: the one about finding a dead mouse in her pants (while wearing said pants), the story about her girlhood infatuation with Roddy McDowell, the "romantic" tales of her "dating" experiences in NYC with creepy taxicab drivers making inappropriate advances
- I found her Midwestern candor and quest for career fulfillment terribly relatable, not to mention funny
- Honestly, I don't often laugh out loud while reading, but this book made me bust a gut more than once
Wednesday, February 20, 2013
Honestly, it's been ages since I've laughed at anything as hard as I laughed at this last night. Maybe I'm just a sucker for a Benny Hill homage, but hot damn, this was brilliant.
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
Tuesday, 2:47 P.M.: Caller reports she has seen at least six stray cats today that have never been around before.
Friday, 5:27 P.M.: Caller reports his car was stolen from the Walmart associate parking lot. Stated he lost his car keys and did not know where they were. Update: caller called back and said he had left his car in the service center lot on the opposite side of the building and forgot.
Friday, 9:30 P.M.: 911 call reporting upstairs neighbors "stomping." Update: a two year-old was walking around.
Sunday, 10:44 P.M.: 911 caller wanted to report a "hate crime," said people had drawn a confederate flag in the snow on his car.
Monday, 8:21 A.M.: Open air 911 call, sounds like a bunch of girls at school talking about new hair styles and a boy.
Thursday, February 14, 2013
As I posted on Facebook earlier this week:
"What do me & the Pope have in common? (Well, besides our mutual love of height-enhancing hats, obviously.)
We're both leaving our jobs on February 28th.
P.S. Hey, Pope -- way to steal my thunder! I was waiting all weekend to announce this!"
Yes, it's true. Two weeks from today will be my last day at the Law Factory. And so comes the end of an era.
Or, well, seven years. Can seven years count as an era? At my age, I think so. Especially considering that I barely lasted four days at the job I held immediately prior to this one. (Granted, that job was a shit storm.)
(All the phone message books I've filled since March 2006. That's a lotta phone calls.)
Modern etiquette dictates that you shouldn't blog about where you work, so for the most part, I haven't. What has made it on here over the years didn't really have anything to do with my actual job -- the setting was incidental, just part of the backdrop. But oh, what a glorious, richly-woven tapestry of a backdrop it's been.
Ever since I gave my notice, I've had a scene from Seinfeld stuck in my head -- it's from the episode when Mr. Pitt fires Elaine because he thinks she and Jerry are plotting to murder him. There's a montage that plays at the very end...you'll know it when you see it.
Crazy people mad at the government/their neighbors/the Democrats
Crazy people with no concept of keeping their inner monologues, well, inner
Weird busted-up stuff in the alley (and weird stuff in the fax machine)
People who have a hard time using phone books
Messy messes and climate control issues
And especially this. Monkey story, I think I'm going to miss you most of all.
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Friday, February 08, 2013
Tuesday, 8:20 A.M.: Report of a cow being kept in a dog kennel.
Wednesday, 3:38 P.M.: Neighbor's dog keeps pooping in caller's yard and he wants it to stop.
Friday, 9:36 A.M.: Caller says someone is leaving mean messages on his voicemail, telling him to “___ off” and “___ you” and other mean slurs. He would like her to stop doing that.
Saturday, 2:02 P.M.: Caller in Town of Kelly reports her daughter has trashed her house, pouring maple syrup all over the residence.
Sunday, 1:23 P.M.: 911 open air call. Dispatch could hear someone saying "shit" over and over. Update: dispatch called the number back and spoke with caller who said he sat on his phone.